Sunday 12 April 2015

What.The.F*$%.- Week 21

What.The.F*S%.

I knew this day was coming... I had been warned about it by some of the past FTEC fighters... the day that we would get in the ring against Virgil. I never really thought anything of it and with my confidence building each day, I thought it couldn't be THAT bad.

I WAS WRONG.

'Shocking' is the best way I could describe what went down yesterday. How could Virgil, this beautiful, amazing, NICE man who I thought was my FRIEND turn into this evil villain and punch me THAT hard SO many times in the face? SHOCK. How rude.

I had to wait my turn as I watched him basically beat up everyone that went before me.  I took a few deeps breaths, gave myself an actual pep talk in the mirror and reluctantly stepped into the ring. I was asking Sasa (my corner coach for this fight) so many questions just to delay this from actually happening. I honestly can't even explain to you how it all went down because I forgot every single thing I've ever been taught thus far in boxing. The first two minutes surprisingly went by fairly quickly and I was sitting in my corner, with Sasa in front of me giving me water as my tears came FLOWING down my cheeks. He asked if I wanted to stop and I asked him to wipe my tears off my face. I was ready for round two. The next two rounds went by slower than the first one but I felt like I stood my ground a little better than I did initially. I was focused and out of the 'survival mode' I fell into right off the bat.

Finally, I was done and still standing- until I raced to the bathroom and fell to the floor in full on hysterics. Come on, of course I cried. I have NEVER felt anything like this before. Physically, I was fine, I was just emotionally drained from six long minutes. So many different thoughts were entering and exiting my brain. I didn't even know what to think.

What I do know is I am SO thankful that so many of my 'crazy' Kingsway Boxing family have and just did go through the exact same experience I did. I wasn't alone. I mean, maybe some of the guys didn't outwardly show their feelings like I did, but I could sense their tears building up...just wanting to be set free. I had the best talks with some amazing people who finally calmed me down after this insane experience. Thank you guys, you know who you are. :)

Now, sitting here feeling like an actual truck ran over me, I have a whole new set of emotions. I am BEYOND proud of myself. I made it through three full rounds with a MAN who is big, strong and an experienced and amazing boxer who also knows exactly how I fight. OF COURSE he was going to beat me up!
My weaknesses became VERY obvious to me and I am already working on them every time I pass a mirror in my condo. I am a boxer and I am stronger than I ever thought I could be. I am surprising myself!

I didn't realize coming into this entire experience, how much it was going to change me. I had the opportunity to take this stand and chose to knock cancer out and I'm doing it for those who weren't and won't be given that choice.

Today I am feeling strong, motivated, powerful and amazing.

Side note: Jenn and David came to my work on Thursday to film The Princess Margaret's President & CEO, Paul Alofs and to get some funny little clips of me, hard at work! I can't wait to see how everything comes together!! It was such a fun afternoon!

Have a great week, people and don't forget to take a minute and acknowledge how amazing you are every once in a while!

PS Check out these amazing pics by Nicholas Theodorou taken on Easter Weekend from our video shoot!







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